


Time We Had A Talk

by Magicandmalice



Series: Bound [3]
Category: Mass Effect, Mass Effect Trilogy
Genre: Dom Kaidan Alenko, Dom/Sub Relationship Discussion, Dom/sub, Kink Negotiation, M/M, Sub John Shepard, kaidan has a dirty mouth
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-05
Updated: 2017-05-05
Packaged: 2018-10-28 09:04:09
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,729
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10828107
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Magicandmalice/pseuds/Magicandmalice
Summary: “... comes with benefits.” Kaidan purred as they sat together. He couldn't believe it; after months of trying to prove how serious he was Shepard had agreed to meet him for lunch and was telling him they could try to be together. He couldn't remember the last time he had been this happy. After their nighttime discussion so long ago, Kaidan was starting to worry Shepard had forgotten it or decided it wasn't worth it… that Kaidan wasn't worth it. He had never been so pleased to be wrong.





	Time We Had A Talk

**Author's Note:**

  * For [sparkly_butthole](https://archiveofourown.org/users/sparkly_butthole/gifts).



> After a long wait and a kick in the ass here is the next part for your veiwing pleasure. You may thank Sparkly_Butthole for making me get it done and doing all the beta work.

“How are you feeling?” 

Kaidan started as he looked up and spotted Shepard standing in the doorway.

“Shouldn’t I be asking you that?” Kaidan asked softly as he motioned towards the couch he was sitting on, indicating that Shepard should join him. It had been two days since Thane's death and Kaidan had decided to give Shepard some time to grieve before talking to him. He certainly hasn't been expecting the Commander to seek him out for anything first.

“You were the one just out of the hospital, pushed into a firefight, and having to kill someone you thought you could trust. I think you deserve having someone ask after you.” Shepard said as he took a seat on the couch, keeping his eyes on the viewport and watching the stars.

“But you lost someone you cared about. There is a difference between the two.” 

“I made my peace with Thane’s passing. It will always hurt, I know, but it's better that he went the way he did. In battle protecting the people he loved rather than a slow painful death as his body shuts down.” Shepard said softly.

“As you say Shepard. Now other than asking if I am settling in alright was there anything else you wanted? Or can we talk off the record?” Kaidan asked, biting the bullet and deciding to get this over with quickly before he chickened out. It might not be the best time for this, but no one had ever accused him of being subtle. 

“Off the record?”

“Yes, as in no military or Spectre rank and status, just two guys, nothing more. I had something I wanted to talk to you about, something private and just between us.” Kaidan managed to get out. Equal parts anticipation and dread churning in his stomach as he realized he was about to actually about to discuss his feeling for Shepard with the man.

“Is it in regards to what you and Garrus were talking about when you two thought I was asleep the other day?” Shepard asked quietly. 

Kaidan froze, his body feeling as if he had just been hit with Stasis, breath caught in his throat as his eyes fell to the floor. “That… is not exactly how I meant for you to find out about that. But yes, it is what I wanted to discuss with you.”

“I honestly don't know what to think about it Kaidan.” Shepard said tilting his head back and staring up at the ceiling. 

“I don't expect you to just jump into my arms Shepard; there is a lot between us, good and bad and most of the bad is on me. I know that, and regardless of what Thane and Garrus have both told me, you and I will take some work to get past that.” Kaidan admitted.

“You spent a lot of time not trusting me.” Shepard whispered.

“I spent a lot of time scared, which is what led to my mistrust.” Kaidan corrected, though he knew it was no excuse.

“What did I ever do that scared you?” Shepard asked, genuinely curious. This man could kill him with his mind and he was scared of Shepard?

“You made me care for you and want something I couldn't have. One day I will tell you what happened to the last person I cared for. I didn't know how to handle any of it, and then with Ash… when you chose me over her…” Kaidan stopped, unable to get the words out.

“I see.”

“Do you really?”

“I do, and it breaks my heart to do this, but right now I need time. I need to know that you trust me and that I can trust you not to doubt me. Without that… we wouldn't last. You and I both know that.” Shepard said wistfully as he stood and headed towards the door.

“Can we be friends at least? I know we said water under the bridge and all at the hospital, but it's not that easy for either of us. Not with this new thing on the table between us. But friends, at least for now, even if nothing else ever happens?” Kaidan asked, almost pleaded. He needed Shepard in his life somehow, even if it was not in every way he wanted. But he was willing to work for it, for Shepard, to show him he was serious about this. That he honestly wanted things right and good between them and to have more of whatever they could be together.

“That’s… yeah, that's a good start I think. For the time being just friends and see what happens, but I think I should go now before this becomes any more awkward. Before we say more than we should. Goodnight Kaidan.” Shepard gets out in a rush before sucking out quickly, door hissing closed behind him.

Kaidan relaxed back into the softness of the couch and stared out the viewport, eyes not seeing the stars and planets they passed as he thought back on their conversation. He had his work cut out for him, that was for sure, but if being with Shepard was his reward then he would do whatever he had to. He would prove that he truly did love and trust Shepard, and that it was safe for Shepard to give Kaidan his heart. He would make this work if it was the last thing he did.

 

******************  
“... comes with benefits.” Kaidan purred as they sat together. He couldn't believe it; after months of trying to prove how serious he was Shepard had agreed to meet him for lunch and was telling him they could try to be together. He couldn't remember the last time he had been this happy. After their nighttime discussion so long ago, Kaidan was starting to worry Shepard had forgotten it or decided it wasn't worth it… that Kaidan wasn't worth it. He had never been so pleased to be wrong.

“What kind of benefits?” Shepard asked, knowing exactly what kind of can of worms he was about to open with that question.

Kaidan's eyes darkened and his posture straightened as he looked at Shepard for a moment in silence. 

“That's not a discussion you want us to have here Shepard, not unless you want everyone in the galaxy knowing intimate details about your private life,” Kaidan said. As much as he wanted to tell Shepard in extreme detail, he didn't want Shepard to suffer if those details were made public.

“So what if I did?” Shepard asked in challenge waiting for Kaidan to give him an answer.

“I will do my very best to give you everything you want John, however my priority will be what you need first. Right now you may want me to tell you everything I wish to do to and with you, but you need it to be in a safe and controlled place where no one can use that information against you. So if you want to know that badly, let's return to the Normandy and finish this discussion there.” Kaidan whispered, leaning closer to make sure Shepard heard him and hopefully no one else.

He watched as his words made Shepard shiver, his pupils dilating and his breath hitching when Kaidan said his first name. Shepard was so responsive to something as simple as that? Oh how he wanted to see just how far he could push. But not here. Shepard reputation was too important in the war efforts for them to be careless now.

“I need to speak with a few people here before I head back to the Normandy, but tonight maybe we could talk further about this?” Shepard asked, Kaidan could hear the hope and wanting in that quiet voice.

“That sounds perfect to me. Now let's finish our lunch and enjoy the afternoon for as long as we can.” Kaidan smiled, leaning back in his seat and watching Shepherd’s slight blush as he did exactly as Kaidan had asked.

Tonight couldn't come fast enough.

 

*******************

“Kaidan.” Shepard smiled as he opened the door and allowed Kaidan into his private quarters. He had been so worried he had changed his mind about them, so nervous. He was still nervous but for new reason now than before.

“Hey Shepard, could I interest you in a drink?” Kaidan asked holding up two glasses and a bottle of whisky, real stuff too, not that fake shit most places served

“I… yeah…” Shepard said, watching Kaidan make quick work of the drinks before handing one off to Shepard. He may have taken a larger drink than was polite but he needed something to steady his nerves.

“Hey relax, it's just us John. There is no need to be so nervous.” Kaidan murmured as he came closer to Shepard, slipping his hand into the others and entwining their fingers. “This alright?”

“Yeah...sorry, I just never thought, never dreamed I would get to have this. I am so scared I am going to do something to mess it up.” Shepard admitted as he squeezed the fingers in his grasp. It was silly, really, that something so simple as holding one another's hands made his heart race even as it soothed his frayed nerves.

“Trust me John, I am just as scared of messing things up as you are. But that's what tonight is for, we are going to sit on that very comfortable looking couch, drink our over priced whisky, and figure out exactly what we both want out of a relationship with each other. Sound good to you?” Kaidan asked.

Shepard responded by pulling Kaidan over to the couch and pushing him down, following quickly to sit at his side, never once letting their hands part. 

“Tell me what you want, Kaidan.” Shepard whispered. 

“You, John. I want all of you, from the deadly N7 Specter Commander Shepard, to the John Shepard begging to kneel at my feet and let me take care of him. You would give your life to protect those you love, you're kind and strong and care far too much for others. You make the hard choices the rest of us can't or won't so that we can live with ourselves afterwards, while you have nightmares every night about what if you could have made a different choice, whether or not you did the right thing? You carry the weight of a galaxy on your shoulders… I want to help you put that weight down for whatever time you will let me.” Kaidan answered honestly.

“But that's not entirely what you're asking for, is it? You want to know if I want you on your knees as you obey my every command. Want to know if I will tease, torment, and use you until your mind is empty of everything. You want to know if I will give you what you need and take you so far out of your own head you can't think of anything or anyone else. Need to know if I will love you, if I will own you. Is that closer to what you are wanting from me John?” Kaidan murmured as he pulled the other closer to him.

“Yes.” Shepard moaned softly, blue eyes gone hazy with desire at Kaidan words.

“I need more than that John, be clear and tell me exactly what you want.” Kaidan ordered. He refused to let there be any misunderstanding between the two of them in regards to this. 

“I want to be yours Kaidan. Yours to love, to own. I love the idea of everyone knowing we are together. I only ask that this aspect of our relationship remains in this room, doesn't interfere with our work.” Shepard said.

“That was my intention to begin with. I won't hide my love for you, but what happens in this room stays between us, it's nobody else's business unless we want it to be. I also have no desire to be in charge of the war effort. I will happily remain at your back and support you however you need, but you're the boss when it comes to anything work related.” Kaidan assured him.

“And if I decide I do not want something?”

“John, never think you have to do something you don't want to or can't do. That's not what this is about at all. We are going to take this slow, you are going to take some time to think of a safeword. Then we will ease into this. I am not going to do anything you can't handle. That doesn't mean I won't push your boundaries, just that I won't overstep. The last thing I want is to ever hurt you.” Kaidan swore fiercely, eyes bright with promise.

“Thank you.” Shepard breathed; he couldn't remember the last time he had felt so happy. He had wanted this for so long and now that he was able to have what he wanted, he wasn't sure where to start. Or rather, he wasn't sure if it was too soon to ask for it. Kaidan had said they were going to take things slow after all.

“Go ahead and ask me whatever is turning over in that mind if yours. Never be afraid or ashamed to ask me for something you want, John.” Kaidan said after he had watched the other man frown for several moments.

“I know you said we were going to take things slow, and I am glad for that, honestly. But could I ask for a kiss?” Shepard asked hesitantly. He hated being this unsure of things, but this was all new territory for him. With Thane and Garrus it had always been easy; he knew they were safe, would never do more than exactly what he asked for. But it was different with Kaidan; all he wanted was to please the stunning biotic. 

“Not that slow, John, come here.” Kaidan laughed softly and rolled his eyes as he pulled Shepard into his lap and leaned up to finally kiss him. The first kiss was chaste, a simple press of lips before parting to look at each other. The second was so much more, hot and wet, slick lips sliding against one another, tongues slipping inside to taste what each had only dreamed of before.

Shepard pressed himself closer, wanting to feel Kaidan's hard body more fully against his own, inhaled deeply the spicy, dark, scent that clung to Kaidan's skin. He couldn't help the soft mewl of disappointment as Kaidan pulled back and held the two of them apart.

“You asked for a kiss and that's what you received John. Trust me to give you what you need, which right now is going no further than we have.” Kaidan said gently. He wanted to continue, oh god did he want to, but he needed to let Shepard have time to sort things out in his own mind about what they had discussed this evening. Distracting the man with kisses and Kaidan running his hands all over him would not help either of them. 

“You're a tease, Alenko” Shepard pouted as he finally gave in and climbed off of the others lap.

Kaidan chuckled as Shepard escorted him to the door. At the last minute, though, he grabbed Shepard and pinned him to the wall. Placing his lips next to the others ear, he nipped at it gently.

“A tease would be telling you to make sure you're ready for me, cause when I finally have you, you won't be able to leave that bed for a week once I am done. That ass will be such a lovely shade of red from my hands and your body will be so sensitive to my touch you'll cum from just a single finger along your skin. There won't be room left for anyone or anything else in your mind except me and whatever I do next. Goodnight John.” Kaidan purred and then was out the door before Shepard could even stand up straight.

Shepard stood there shaking with arousal for several moments before making his way to the bathroom. A cold shower was needed, very cold, then he would sit down and figure everything else out. If he happened to come up with a few ideas to drive Kaidan insane in the process… well, nothing wrong with that. Two could play at this game.

**Author's Note:**

> Interested in chatting or tossing a prompt or two my way come say hi to me on tumblr, I promise I don't bite only the characters do.
> 
> Magicandmalice.tumblr.com


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